WHY?

Newsletter

Fighting for gender equality for men in situations such as family courts,

and belief from the justice system that men and kids are victims of domestic abuse. 

Suffragents Message

14 Mar 2016

We have to cease Private Law, it is wasting resources in Family Law that should be allocated for the rearing of Children.

 

Misery and ruining lives should benefit no-one.

02 Jul 2018

There will be a General Election in 2020, and a key question will be ... Which Political Party will get the 4,000,000 votes that will be available from marginalised Fathers, their Parents, their Friends and Siblings, plus the Children that will be able to vote as young Adults that were victims of Parental Alienation, all because of biased Divorce Proceedings. What impact will these votes have on marginal seats?

05 Dec 2016

Californian, Kathy Murray, says she saved her marriage by giving up trying to control her husband. Despite considering herself a feminist, she follows - and now teaches others - the approach of a controversial book called The Surrendered Wife, which tells women to stop nagging their partners and start treating them with more respect.

30 Nov 2016

Senior social workers and police officers in Derbyshire have been found to have falsified and destroyed records of child abuse by a mother.

28 Sep 2016

It's believed that few heterosexual men report being victims of domestic abuse because of shame, but how much truth is there in this statement?

17 Aug 2016

The prison sentencing and conditions for women are different to those for men.

20 Jul 2016

Parental Alienation is now starting to be recognised by the courts in England and Wales, but we still have a long way to go.

12 Jul 2016

Was Theresa May’s observation of the problems with Family Courts stymied by others, and that she really wants to help families, and most importantly the children, in a truly Gender Free environment. Who stifled her beliefs? Now as PM she can bring to bear her strong views as outlined in Bournemouth in October 2004. Unfortunately in Politics you have to be patient and there may be other forces at work to stop you attaining your reasonable goals. We look forward to the changes she wants.

04 Jul 2016

This Women and Girl Focused Report shows how much influence Women’s Aid have upon the Government’s Policies and considerable Financial support offered to Women and Girl issues, totally ignoring the abuse that men and children suffer at the hands of women in the areas of both mental and physical abuse. It is generally accepted that 40 % of reported abuse is from men, and then that is a low figure because men do not come forward for fear of losing their children, home and jobs. The statistics are unrepresentative of what is really happening in Society.

03 Jul 2016

Sensible Judges despair of Social Services support facilities. 

Our question is this... What punitive action has been taken against those who have wasted the Court's times? Too frequently our courts believe the accuser and her support team. How many other children's lives have been ruined by false allegations against a father?

30 Jun 2016

Jeremy Corbyn does not believe in Shared Parenting and strengthening a child's relationship with their grandparents. Many disagree because the decision concerning the Resident Parent is made by Courts on a ‘Balance of Probability’ and not upon forensic evidence. A man is deemed ‘Guilty’ unless he can prove his innocence from false allegations, and is not allowed to have a competent ability to counter them. This is grossly unjust and not in the spirit of making the needs of a child/children paramount.

28 Jun 2016

From a Suffragents Follower: "I just wanted to share with you that I had massive win in the criminal court the other week for my children. I'd been assaulted by my wife last year and in doing so she broke the court order which was in place. ...

09 Jun 2016

"Why are our courts so under the jackboot of SOME women????? Many men have to be LIP and now even McKenzie Friends are in danger because of The Law Society who will do a Pontious Pilate when a man commits suicide because he cannot cope and get a fair hearing. He will not have the money to pay for Solicitors, so he gives up!!!

Read my story..."

09 Jun 2016

Read what the family courts expect from parents asking for a court order. The courts consider that these guidelines apply to all children and all parents, no exceptions.

06 Jun 2016

Why are secret Family Courts held in disrespect by those who come into contact with them and have no real ability to defend themselves? Where the needs of a mother in many cases exceeds the needs of the child, contrary to where the child’s needs are paramount.

04 Mar 2016

Suffragents believes in the following...

04 Feb 2016

Our results show that men are being marginalised during the divorce proceedings, view the results here. Our mission statement is to ensure that Legal Changes take place to reflect that Fathers and their children do have a right to bond and know one another. It is acknowledged that the children of fatherless homes are more at risk of not developing their full potential for future life.

27 Jan 2016

The Men's Advisory Project, an organisation providing help for male victims of domestic abuse, say they have seen an increase in people asking for help. However, they still feel that there are not as many services in Northern Ireland available for men, as there are for women.   

25 Jan 2016

Tune into Cambridge 105 on Tuesday 26th January, from about 14.30pm, where Suffragents will be discussing Marginalisation of Men in 21st Century, with Matt Webb. We'll be covering Divorce, Abuse, Kids not being with fathers as the Resident Parent, Old Fashioned Attachment Theories, Recent Legislation on Coercive and Controlling Behaviour and Parental Alienation.

 

Listen to the show.

22 Jan 2016

According to a press release from our Government, only women and girls can suffer as victims of coercive or controlling behaviour. Karen Bradley MP said, “No one should live in fear of domestic abuse, which is why this government has made ending violence against women and girls a priority." This is overt sexism. No wonder there is a breakdown in society and men feel marginalised.

07 Jan 2016

Dads House is a charitable organisation to help single dads, giving them support, advice and information. They are now able to offer housing for fathers in need of accommodation (currently based in South London). Visit their website for more information.

05 Jan 2016

From one of our Supporters: "Although my divorce was over a decade ago, I still shudder at the antiquated views of the family courts and even my own lawyers when I said that my young kids needed regular contact with me. So much so, that I have written a book about my life (as a novel, with a pen name) , in which I talk about the importance of family, kids needing both parents (and so much more)."  

 

Read an extract from the novel

15 Dec 2015

From Facebook Follower, Andy B: "... Reminding me of my time as a chorister and head chorister, of being homeless and of the Christmases I spent alone and on the streets. Missing my children, turfed out by a psychotic partner who was hooked on drink and drugs. Falsely accused, abused, on a piece of cardboard in a shop doorway or the local park shivering under a tree, heartbreaking and confused as to what I'd done to deserve it. Nothing. It was her. I've never spent a single Christmas with my youngest kids. ... Appreciate all you have this festive season ... My one wish would be to spend just one Christmas with ALL my children and loved ones under the same roof together laughing, singing having fun, the way it should have been."

10 Dec 2015

The differences in how men and women are treated by society.

10 Dec 2015

Why is it that feminists say they need so little, and yet demand so much?

 

Watch the YouTube video.  

10 Dec 2015

Children should have the opportunity to maintain a full relationship with both parents. Information on overcoming the arguments to Shared Parenting (taken from SPIG UK).   

10 Dec 2015

Fathers are important in the healthy development of children. Children deserve nurturing families and environments in which their physical, emotional, educational, and social needs are met.

26 Nov 2015

Emotionally coercive and controlling behaviour is a form of abuse. Recognise the signs.

25 Nov 2015

South Wales Police are working in support of the White Ribbon Campaign of Eradicating Male Violence Against Women. But what about other victims? What about domestic violence against men? ALL violence should not be tolerated, and that includes against men and children.

25 Nov 2015

When parents are asked about the essential needs of their children during and after parental separation, children's emotional, psychological, social, moral and spiritual needs are seen to be of paramount importance. But what exactly are these "metaphysical" needs? How do we establish a more precise definition of the "best interests of the child"?

13 Nov 2015

There was an article in the Bedfordshire on Sunday that refers to a man who committed suicide and had a marriage breakdown, and the coroner put the suicide down to 'Too much Stress and drinking too much'. How much did the Coroner really understand about how a man feels when his marriage breaks down? Obviously, I am not party to any information about this Engineer's relationship or whether he had any kids, but the matter should have been investigated more thoroughly. 4,700 men gave up on life in the last year of records, and that is too many.

09 Nov 2015

Frequently this is referred to as an alternative to using Solicitors, Barristers or QCs. Where a person is unable to generally fund a Legal Team they need to understand the protocols of being in a Family Court. Not having the time to learn ‘Legaleaze’ they will frequently use the services of a McKenzie Friend to advise them on procedural matters and how to present a case.

06 Nov 2015

We have written a letter to our Prime Minister, expressing our distaste at how men are being marginalised in society and nearly 4,000,000 children are fatherless. This is not good for Society and its cohesion. 

03 Nov 2015

Statistics show that over 42% of marriages will end in divorce, and of those divorces, 65% were granted to women. Men are treated unfairly in the proceedings.

03 Nov 2015

There is a higher rate of suicide in men than women, but has anyone investigated the reasons why?

03 Nov 2015

Having babies affect men’s hormones that help to promote and develop bonding with their newborn babies.

06 Oct 2015

See the difference in how men and women are treated by the police, and the way that news stories are reported. We hate double standards, in the same way as male complaints about being subject to abuse from their spouses are treated totally differently than if it was a woman making a complaint to the Police.

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"TBH, I wouldn't trust any solicitor. In short, just after my son was born in June 2010, I was arrested for various ''allegations'' and ended up with a 4 year restraining order. No previous before this as a gentleman of good character. After a few days of sentencing, I got a Facebook message from my so called previous partner, which says, ''I'm sorry for the lies and allegations my mum made me do it so her side would stick, we only wanted you to do things our way, please forgive me for this''. Now, tried to inform the so called solicitors of this, and also at least 2 police stations in person in Manchester and also a different police force in another area as I have since moved from many miles Manchester, but guess what, they don't want to know and are making it very difficult for me. Also in addition to this a number of other messages from my previous partner which is basically admittance to ''perjury'', and also because the arresting officer on the night of my arrest is still to this date a sergeant within greater Manchester police, who actually booked me in on the night of my arrest. My previous partner later admitted to this and that this was all pre planned and pre meditated. ''Why do you think Chxxx was on duty that night at the police station, to ensure the allegations would stick''. Apart from being wrongly advised by the solicitors to also ''Admit'' to these offences, for which is also unlawful, (Human rights act Schedule 1, Part 1, Article 2, Article 6, Right to a fair trial). The solicitor said '' Probably get told to not do it again and a small fine, nothing more''. Oh, how wrong where they. Also, after sentencing, when I finally saw the statements given by my previous partner, I would like to know how I did some of these things, especially at the time and date I was supposed to have done something, when I was over 200 miles away at my own father’s funeral. I have tried to make the solicitors and police aware of this, but, they just don't want to know. I have had very little contact with my son since he was born, and bit by bit, I have been studying various legal avenues, but, I most certainly NOT ALLOW, a solicitor to act on my behalf. If you can, go and study the legal system and how it works. There are various ''Jurisdictions'' within the courts of the UK, but, you do have to be very cautious and careful, especially when you are perhaps ''Advising'' A Judge on how they should perhaps be doing their job and to the legislation, act's or governance to which you are applying. I have a mountain to climb, I cant yet see the top, but, on the other side is my son. I have been climbing this mountain for many years, and hopefully within the next year or so once I have gathered enough information and knowledge, I will reach the top of the mountain, and there will be my son. Good luck and god bless everybody."

David J

"Can anyone help me? I haven't been allowed access to see my children for over 2 and a half years. I'm 42, they're both 3 in October this year, twins, boy and a girl. I never wanted a family, not with the mother of my children, because I knew our relationship was a sham and that we wouldn't stay together. Still, I stood by her throughout the pregnancy, went to every scan but one, because I was ill and for that I got shouted at. I was there at the birth of my children, when most dads are too squeamish or consider it not their business, and I just want to see them, hold them, start a relationship, but my ex, her family, and my own have systematically denied me access. I was so that I gave up on life, I tried several times to kill myself, ended up in hospital, ended up homeless and robbed of independence. I was so worried about my health and the intimidation of not being allowed to see my kids, I don't know if something evil has entered my life, keeping me from my kids. I've begged and tried every reasonable suggestion and offer of contact but am met with continued excuses. It's the worst thing that has ever happened and has affected my entire life, my happiness and will to live, of which I have very little left. HELP! PLEASE HELP! I miss them and need to see them and engage with them. ... I try Citizens Advice and all they offer is a loop of useless advice which is complex and off putting. I need direct help and action, now. I am the most loving, caring, hug deprived human I know. It seems that for that reason alone, I am being punished. HELP ME PLEASE! HELP MY CHILDREN HAVE THEIR FATHER! I am suicidal, have been through utter hell, and I feel alone. Please help me, anybody, please!! Thank you."

Alex S

"My ex push on a floor twice, punch me, send on me heavy objects plate ashtrays... then when I ask to leave she call woman help because she wanted to stay with crocodile tears. Never touch her help her paid 3k loan and buy a new car worth 5k. Couldn't be home 2 mins late and refuse to help me in anyway. No some woman are as bad if not worse then man. She put me out of having any other relation, still feel for her but that had to stop."

Nathanael D

"I've not seen my kids for over 6 months, they've been alienated, she doesn't have to work her husband is a millionaire sociopath and moved them all 130 miles away, they've broken no less than 7 court orders with no repercussion... I've given up, and even now I'm still getting probs."

Richard H

"I pay £500 a month... I see my kids I buy them stuff and yet this seems over the top. I lost my home which was a 4 bed house. Ex said she needed the house yet once I moved out and we were divorced she moved in with Her Boyfriend the one she left me for and cheated on me. Now she rents out my 4 bed ******* joke. The Divorce laws in this Country favour women."

Jon T

"We've all got a story, and there's a common theme. My ex partner contacted the CMS after I stopped the direct pay arrangement we had. They told me how much I should be paying. I informed them (the CMS) about the inadequate care provided by their mum and how they had no right to put a price on my children's heads. I told them not to write to me concerning this and if they did a reply would cost them £150. They didn't listen, so I billed them. I will be taking this to court. I'm fed up of the warmongering, political patheticness practiced by the parties."

Matt R

"It's a killer more so not seeing my daughter as I love her to bits and always made time for her even when I was dog tired and should've been sleeping after doing long shifts gritting all hours etc, took her out instead of sleeping. ... I hope I can get to see her, been to court spent over £11,000 solicitors and barristers were useless and didn't have the passion to help me only keep taking my money worked my a*** off earning money to pay extortionate legal fees for nothing, only to get battered by csa to pay her even more money for the privilege of her stopping me from seeing my child and having to go to court and all I attained was parental responsibility that's not worth a carrot."

Wayne E

"I paid 600 quid a month for a son that I haven't seen for 20 years. I only stopped paying when he was 19. I spent 2 years and 8 thousand pounds in court and when I won she just moved to the north of Scotland and left no forward details. How is this acceptable?"

David P

"I pay £350 a month and despite 5 court orders giving me contact have not seen them in 2 years. My solicitor said you have one big thing against you I'm afraid, you're a man and the Laws here will always favour the woman. That's how it is, I'm sorry to have to tell you that, but its fact."

Mark S

"Today, we made an application for a mortgage on our council property, we have the "right to buy", it is a fantastic opportunity for us with a great discount on the value of the property. We had done the "sums" and believe, although tight, we can afford the repayments.We have been refused due to some "small hurdles" we could have resolved, but unfortunately one very big hurdle we can't really see a way around. The maintenance I regularly pay my X wife for our kids is seen as "money owed" and has lost us £50,000 on the application, I really think this Sucks!!! It's a real sign of the times for split/divorced men and the struggles they encounter!! I'm not angry or even particularly upset, I'm just disappointed that my "situation" still affects my new relationship/life so negatively."

Richard H

"It's extremely difficult to tell anyone that your wife is violent, the ridiculous thing is that the violent women would never raise a hand to a man that would hit them back. My ex wife KNEW that I never had and never would hit a women, so regularly punched and threw things at me, but the only time I grabbed her wrist to stop her, she ran to her father to say I had hurt her. He got all aggressive with me until I explained, then when she admitted the punches and said she would do it again, he departed faster than he arrived without condemning her."

Steve B

"I have just been given custody of my son by the social services. However, during the last 6 months it has taken the arrest of his mum on 3 occasions for drunkenness and violent assault for them to listen to me. During our relationship I was assaulted on more than 1 occasion, and yet everytime it was me who was questioned, and arrested on one occasion. This was despite being bitten on both my arms and my leg like a dog. The arresting female office couldn't believe my injuries and refused to handcuff me, the interviewing officer initially refused to believe me until I showed her my Injuries and then proceeded to call me a disgrace to other men for refusing to press charges. I am a serving fire officer and didn't want my employer or colleagues to find out."

B E Taylor

"Although my divorce was over a decade ago, I still shudder at the antiquated views of the family courts and even my own lawyers when I said that my young kids needed regular contact with me."

Andy C

"Whilst I agree with in part Kathryn in shared parenting, etc, etc, the point we are making is that in this real world where women are more guilty of separating the child from the father. The point is here that fathers or men don't have the same rights as women with regards to parental rights, divorce, financial issues etc. In the real world, including my case, the other parent has stopped me seeing my child against the law and the judge whom said I was to have regular contact with my child, it is also against the Geneva Convention in keeping the child away from the father. Financially my ex decided that what my solicitor and I had worked out to pay her based on 15% of my then income, she believing that wasn't enough, greed kicked in and she went to the csa which reduced her award. The fact that she went to the csa meant that I could no longer work overtime or take another job to help me to survive. In September 2014 my ex decided on her own to stop me seeing my child under false allegations of taking money from my daughter's bank account, which she knew was a lie and an excuse yet again to stop me seeing my child. I tried to take my own life because of this. As an ex serviceman I was suffering ptsd and this didn't help, I was almost bankrupted due to taking her through the family court to get access to my child. I'm still paying for it. I took ill and my company stopped my sick pay, leaving me relying on food banks, handouts and help from ex serviceman's associations, only going back to work before Xmas 2015. I didn't see my child that Xmas either, her presents are still sitting on her bed. In the New Year 2015 my health took a dive and I had to be medically retired from work. Throughout all this my ex has been spoken to by police on several occasions about her behaviour, and still she's not been arrested. She has verbally aroused me mother and sisters and threatened violence against my niece who was then 13 years old. She was warned also about her making offensive gestures etc. all in front of my daughter. Again she was not arrested. Social services and the judiciary always take the side of the woman. Men are perceived to be violent or rapists etc. They forget that men can be bullied and have violence meted out to them, as it was to me. Only a month ago my ex tried again to rile me by driving on my tailgate in a residential area and then went on to verbally abuse me and then went into the shop to buy beer and then talk about me and our business in front of strangers. I waved at a mate and she drive back into the car park to further abuse me. She even wrote to the my daughter's teacher saying I was not to have or be involved in my daughter's education. Why? Where does she think she can get off on doing this? The police's answer he doesn't think the courts wouldn't do anything. She has consistently and blatantly flouted the law and got away with it. If I did that I'd be in jail no questions asked. All I want is to see my child and share in her upbringing, there a lot of errant fathers whom don't want nothing to do with their children or women whom only see motherhood as a cash cow or a means to get on the housing list. I love my daughter dearly and want to be involved in her life, but this is being denied me."

Thomas E

"...Reminding me of my time as a chorister and head chorister, of being homeless and of the Christmases I spent alone and on the streets. Missing my children, turfed out by a psychotic partner who was hooked on drink and drugs. Falsely accused, abused, on a piece of cardboard in a shop doorway or the local park shivering under a tree, heartbreaking and confused as to what I'd done to deserve it. Nothing. It was her. I've never spent a single Christmas with my youngest kids. Ever, never will."

Andy B

"I was attacked by my wife while she was drunk as a result ended up with black eye with cut to side of it, scratches down my left arm and as I was naked scratches all the way across my groin yet I was charged with assault because I pushed her away, at court it was thrown out yet a restraining order she took out remained in place. I have joint custody of our children yet she won't let me see them totally unfair I was advised to press charges against her but when I tried was given a warning for wasting police time so had to get a solicitor involved that was May last year I've paid over £7000 and still not seen my 3 daughters and had no apology from police even though I'm now pressing charges it's ridiculous."

Neil I

"As a child, a court of law decided that I could no longer see my father and awarded full custody to my Mother. As an adult, I have always enabled my children to have a relationship with their Father, despite our differences, because I know how it feels to miss an absent parent. I have bent over backwards to accommodate this, sometimes at detriment to myself, because having gone through the experience myself as a child, with no say in the matter, I vowed I would never inflict that pain on my own children. And I'm so glad I did. Children are not pawns to be used in a game. To all of you out there, be that Mother OR Father, who use their children to score points against your Ex, DON'T!! You are doing your children a great disservice, one they don't deserve. YOU are the adult, behave like one!!"

Gina N

"I know one case where the police arrested this innocent man with no previous conviction, based on a false complaint made by his vindictive ex-partner. Their excuse was when it's domestic it's taken very seriously. Only thing is they don't need serious evidence from the woman. Just the mere allegation will do! It's crazy but it's toxic feminism."

Yamin Z

"All I'd ever wanted was the chance to prove her lies, against me and blatantly about legal issues, that she handily dropped as soon as she had the interim court order in her favour. That one thing, that set of lies, and not being allowed to question them, despite them being obvious, has screwed the rest of my life."

Gary P

"The local police was on my side all of the way as they could not believe how my ex wife was getting away with her continuous lies in court even tho I had the evidence to prove she was lying but Cafcass had the last word for which I was the violent one & not her."

Chris T

"Living in South Wales, I can tell you that the Police are appalling. I got stabbed with a fork and cut on my arms by a woman and the case was thrown out. Police never sent a photographer, changed my statement and were on speaking terms with my attacker."

David L

"I was stopped by the metropolitan police when returning home and told that I was not allowed to go home as my wife (now ex-wife) had made allegations of domestic violence and feared for her safety, I told them this was not true and I could prove so, they were not interested in what I had to say, because she didn't want to make any charges against me there was no need for my side of the story, it was irrelevant! I said if I am not being arrested surely I am entitled to return home? I was told that if I tried to return home I would be arrested for disturbing the peace, I said I haven't done anything to disturb the peace? Refusing to do as they have told me would be a disturbance of the peace! My solicitor told me I should make a complaint, metropolitan police had nothing on record and said it was Essex police, Essex police said the same thing, so how do you complain about something that never happened?"

Paul D

"I think a woman's voice should be heard, I have never agreed with women who have made a totally selfish decision for their children who are clearly loved by their dads, otherwise you wouldn't be on here, Women can be very bitter and use their children, brainwash them and claim all sorts of things, men should have more of a right in their child's life, what the women are doing is mentally abusing and emotionally too, where again is our country's values."

Alison L

"I put up with it from my ex, where lost many friends, had no life and I obtained many stab wounds, concussions & broken ribs, but when I challenged her in court for visiting rights of my children all that had been done to me was used against me as the courts were presented evidence to say that I was the perpetrator not her, (even though it was my medical/police records they were apparently presenting). But every time I made a complaint against her to the police after assaulting me she would simply say that I had hit her, and the police would then ignore me and again even though I was the victim !! I wasn't given chance to defend myself and ultimately I lost my life."

Craig J

"This is very sad. Men are regularly abused, intimidated, threatened and made to feel unsafe with regular insults in own homes. We never dream of reporting our partners for this why because we love and cherish them. It would be great if both partners realised the pain they cause each other and worked together by having face to face dialogue in a public place if required to practically deal with issues quickly rather than going through complicated, time and cost intensive proceedings which only have a nasty effect on health, mind and cause emotional distress for both partners and children. This only breaks down the relationship between children and parents adding to the family crisis this is clearly not in anyone's interest."

Abdul R D

"I did suffer mental abuse yet was treated as the abuser by my now ex-wife and her friends. I had evidence of abusive texts and emails from my ex both before and after we split and emails from her friends. I received numerous silent phone calls at all times, I noted the times and duration of the calls. The police did nothing, they weren't interested in the slightest."

James A B

"I used to have respect for the police but after being assaulted by my soon to be ex wife they were useless. After 6 months they still haven't facilitated collecting my belongings from my house after I said she slammed my head in the door in front of my children the last time I tried to collect my possessions and they even said there wasn't much they could do even though she admitted she was so angry that she lent forwards and touched me on the arm 3 times and didn't throw an iPad she placed it in my hand....... Oh yeah because when people are so angry they often result to a touch on the arm and handing an item to people.... I even tried to raise a complaint about the way it was handled and both times they didn't even return my calls... Bridgewater police should be ashamed of themselves and their complaints procedure is designed to stop you complaining."

Nicholas F

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Cause of The Week

 

Welcome to Suffragents. An information site on the campaign for equality for men in situations such as family courts, and belief from the justice system that men and kids are victims of spousal abuse.